A choice?

*Disclaimer: I wrote this in October of 2020, however I felt the need to share it again today in light of what has taken place in Arkansas.

As I laid in my bed at 330 this morning, staring at my ceiling, unable to sleep, I found myself trying to put myself in the shoes of a person that is intolerant of LGBTQ+ people, primarily transgender and non-binary.

Prior to Harper’s transition, I had no idea the struggles, the hate, the misunderstanding that took place amongst this marginalized group of people. I, too admittedly figured it was something you chose. Something you decided. So in fairness, part of me gets where the confusion lies.

But the difference is, I was never hateful. Never once did I think their rights weren’t human rights. That they didn’t deserve to be treated with love and respect.

Yet here I am, raising a transgender daughter. Here I am seeing first hand just how much intolerance and shame so many people have towards the foundation of a person’s gender.

Let me put a question out to the universe. Do you think any human being would CHOOSE this? Choose to live a life filled with discrimination and difficulty? Choose to have basic rights stripped from them just because they don’t fit a social or religious “norm”?

And then ask yourself that same question - but about a child.

Harper has been Harper since May of 2019. In that time there was ONE occasion early on when she said that maybe she should just go back to being a boy. And when she said that, I asked her why.

“Because maybe it would just be easier for everyone else.”

This was at the age of five.

For anyone out there that tries to say that being transgender is a choice, sincerely needs to do some homework. And anyone that doesn’t think kids at this young age aren’t old enough to know better and their brains aren’t developed enough, need to spend a little more time getting to know this next generation.

They are smarter, braver and in most cases mature beyond their years. They deserve more credit than they receive.

The problem isn’t them. It’s you.